


Love, Marriage and Boxing

by Miss_Romance_Lover



Category: Emmerdale, robron
Genre: Boxing, Fluff, M/M, Secret Santa, self harm mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-20 09:29:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13143813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Romance_Lover/pseuds/Miss_Romance_Lover
Summary: My Secret Santa gift written for @wefllag-n on Tumblr :)The evolution of Aaron and boxing, told through highlights of his life and marriage to Robert.





	Love, Marriage and Boxing

When they got back together, there were so many things Aaron and Robert had to talk about. Aaron's lack of self-worth, Robert's lying; their troubled pasts. These were all things that they had worked on individually during their time apart, so by the time they were ready to go over it all they were that much better at the whole communication thing. 

It wasn't until a few days after they renewed their relationship that Robert realised they had forgotten something. Aaron announced that he was heading to the gym, and a feeling of dread settled deep in Robert's stomach.

"Wait," he called out, and Aaron turned away from the door to look at him.

"Yeah?"

"Do you have to go right now, or can we talk for a bit first?"

Aaron raised an eyebrow, but put his gym bag down and came to sit next to him on the sofa. "What's up?"

"I didn't know you were still boxing," Robert blurted out. "That is what you're doing at the gym, isn't it?"

"Yeah. It's once a week, I thought you knew," Aaron spoke softly and calmly, while Robert felt anything but calm. "What's the matter?"

"I'm worried about you."

Before he had taken the time and energy to look after himself, to focus on his mental health, a statement like that would have left Aaron feeling defensive. Now, he could see it for what it was; love and concern. "Robert, I'm okay. I'm more than okay actually."

"But you're still boxing," Robert repeated. It wasn't that he didn't believe Aaron - he could see just by looking at him that he was a much happier man these days, with a much healthier mind. But Robert remembered that he had been in such a bad way not long before he had first taken up the sport, and he couldn't forget it. "If you still need it--"

Aaron cut him off. "I don't need it, not like I used to when everything was getting to me. I just enjoy it now," he explained. "Is it the violence that worries you?"

Robert could only nod.

"Boxing isn't about violence. It's about discipline. At least the way I've been doing it, it is. It's why Uncle Zak started training me. And you know I haven't fought in any matches since that Jason."

Robert smiled at the memory of Aaron, his Aaron - although he hadn't been his back then - refusing to stoop to a bully's level and using words to win instead. The pride of it had him reaching out to stroke the younger man's cheek. "And you didn't fight him because you're a better man than he is."

Aaron leant into the touch, closing his eyes. "And I'm not planning on fighting anyone else anytime soon, either."

"So, what, you just use a punch-bag every week?" Robert wasn't convinced.

With a sigh, Aaron opened his eyes. "Alright, sometimes there's some sparring with some of the other lads at the gym. There's a trainer there, Robert, it's all supervised. Look, why don't you come with me and see for yourself? You've not got anything on till later, have you?"

And that was how, half an hour later, Robert found himself standing in the gym, watching Aaron do warm-up exercises. So far, he had to admit, he preferred seeing this rather than the punishing running schedule Aaron used to put himself through.

By the time his boyfriend had his gloves on and started aiming punches and jabs at the punch-bag, Robert's nerves had calmed a bit. As promised, a professional trainer was on hand - an older man named Charlie. When it looked like Aaron might be going in too hard with his punches, Charlie would call out to stop him from overdoing it. Robert decided he liked this man, even if he still wasn't sure about the boxing.

Aaron took Charlie's instructions and suggestions on board, and Robert noticed the difference in him more and more. Gone was the man who didn't know when to stop himself, who couldn't learn to give himself a break or channel his aggression properly. In his place was this man, this Aaron. Still the man Robert had fallen deeply in love with, only more sure of himself, of who he was.

Robert had to shake himself out of his thoughts when Aaron called his name, and he realised he was taking a break. He followed him over to some chairs in the corner of the room, where they both sat down.

"So," Aaron started in between gulping from his bottle of water. "What d'you reckon, now you've seen what I get up to?"

"I reckon," Robert smiled, leaning closer so Aaron could almost feel his words breathing against his skin. "I should have listened to you earlier. I'm sorry, Aaron. I just can't help myself when it comes to you; I love you too much to risk not checking you're okay."

"I get it. After everything we've been through I guess it would be weird if you didn't question this. I haven't always trusted myself with it to be honest. That's why I wanted to do it properly, get a trainer."

Robert nodded and they both turned at the sound of a male voice addressing Aaron. "Hey, Dingle! Fancy a bit of practise once I've done my stretches?"

"Yeah, go on then," he replied.

Robert leaned back in his chair. "If we weren't in a gym right now I'd be a bit concerned he was coming on to you," he said quietly. Aaron laughed.

"Well, you've nothing to worry about, gym or not. That's my old cell-mate, Ethan. He's straight and he's got a girlfriend. I'll introduce you in a minute."

"Okay. Give us a sweaty kiss first, though."

Aaron happily obliged, then rubbed their foreheads together until Robert was squirming at the transference of sweat. 

"Oi, I'll get you back for that later, Dingle," he promised. Aaron felt a little pang at how much he suddenly missed being called 'Mr Sugden', but decided that was a conversation for another day. Maybe when they hadn't only just got back together.

After meeting Ethan, Robert watched on as he and Aaron sparred, complete with protective headgear, gloves and the watchful eye of Charlie. It seemed a strange environment to feel so content in, but that was exactly how Robert felt at that moment.

He felt even better when Aaron, even sweatier than before, wrapped him in a hug on his way to the changing rooms, and told him, "love you too, by the way." And really, Robert didn't even mind the sharing of sweat this time.

*

They got engaged again a few months later, and married in the summer. It wasn't a big wedding, but it was more than a knees up at the pub for the reception. They went from the registry office to the village hall, and Robert even persuaded Aaron to dance in a way that wasn't classed a swaying. Although he was of course banned from reminding people that it had ever happened.  
As he held his husband in his arms, Robert had a new appreciation for Aaron's toned muscles. This was the first time he'd worn a suit since taking up the boxing, and he looked incredible. Robert had always thought so. But lately Aaron was glowing with a happiness no one had ever seen in him, and it ran much deeper than the superficial. 

Paddy, Chas and Vic had noticed as well. Even Adam, off seeing the world after a difficult few years, had sent Robert a text after a lengthy chat with Aaron, telling him he had never known his best mate to be so content.

Robert knew that he couldn't take anything for granted. There were bound to be days where Aaron still needed support, needed to be reminded that bad days wouldn't last forever. Just as there would be times where Robert would mess up; though never again as catastrophically as he used to.

So moments like these, where nothing could touch them and all was right with the world? They were everything.

He would remember moments like this when, a few months into their marriage, he came home to find Aaron sat on the floor in tears. Pain and pent-up emotion was written all over his face as he told Robert he had almost self-harmed again. 

He had been on an early morning scrap run only to run into Jackson's father, who all these years later still lay the blame for his son's death squarely at Aaron's door. Gerry Walsh's words had broken the strong armour Aaron had built for himself over the last few years, and he had felt himself turn back into that terrified, traumatised nineteen year old lad.

But, Robert reminded him, he hadn't hurt himself this time. He had wanted to do it, and that would need addressing, but he had stopped himself. He'd waited for his husband to come home and confided in him instead. After an hour sat right by Aaron's side, listening to him and talking it through together, Robert felt some of that fighting spirit make it's way back into his husband's system. 

"He's wrong," Aaron said of Jackson's dad. "He didn't know what Jackson wanted. I knew. I would never have done it if I didn't know it was exactly what he wanted."

"I know. He probably knows too, deep down, but it's too hard to admit it." Robert kissed Aaron's temple, and he could tell his husband was still feeling tense. By now, he understood just what would help. "Why don't I drive you to the gym, eh? I bet it's nice and quiet."

"Charlie won't be in today," Aaron pointed out, knowing Robert liked that he had someone keeping an eye on his training and work outs. There was a part of him that worried too, the mood he'd been in - would he over-exert himself?

"Well then I guess I'll stick around, make sure you don't go overboard," Robert nudged him, smiling softly. The younger man returned the gesture. 

He knew this wasn't about any form of control for Robert; it was simply about his husband's wellbeing. Aaron had admitted a while ago that he sometimes worried he might take the boxing too far, despite the fact that he'd been using it as a healthy hobby so far. So to know that Robert had his back and would step in if he needed to slow down was a comfort. 

It was a favour he often returned when the older man needed telling that his jokes or sly digs at people might be a step too far. All it took sometimes was a look from Aaron for Robert to recognise that he ought to just stop talking if he didn't want to be run out of town.

When they had been married for two and a half years, Liv rang from her uni halls to tell them, among other things, that she had joined a boxercise class with some friends. Inspired by Aaron, she had heard about the classes and ended up loving it. Being of a similar temperament to her brother, Liv also had a lot of energy she didn't know what to do with and taking up boxercise seemed to help.

The following week, Aaron told Robert he had had an idea. He was practically bouncing on his feet as he talked, and Robert laughed at his excitement before telling him to at least sit down first. Aaron did so, and then outlined his plans. He wanted to set up a boxing and boxercise class for teenagers and young adults at the gym. 

Robert hadn't been expecting that at all. But he thought it sounded great, and he could tell his opinion mattered to Aaron, who lit up at his husband's praise. It was only when he started detailing the equipment they'd need, the hiring of a trainer and the gym that Aaron suddenly deflated.

"What's wrong?" Robert asked as he trailed off mid-sentence. 

"I'm an idiot," Aaron sighed. "I was thinking of it as some sort of youth club, Rob. I hadn't even thought about how much it all costs."

"What's the problem? We've got money; more than enough to get what you need to set this up."

Aaron shook his head. "That's not...I can't do that. It's your money."

"It's our money, Aaron," Robert reached over and squeezed his hand. "You're my husband. So come on, tell me what brought on this idea of yours. Was it talking to Liv?"

"Yeah, it got me thinking. And then I thought about when I was her age, well, younger than that. Leaving home with all these anger issues and not knowing how to deal with it. I took it out on everyone who tried to help me - Paddy, my mum, Jackson...you. And every other poor git that made an effort with me. It took years before I found a proper outlet for it. What if kids with issues like I had could learn to control their anger before they take it too far? Or kids like Liv could use boxercise to, I don't know, help with their confidence? I feel like, if there had been something like that around when I was younger maybe things would have worked out differently."

Aaron sighed heavily when he had finished speaking, and Robert watched his expression clear and knew that he was taking a moment to free his mind of the past. 

"You are quite incredible, d'you know that?" Robert said when it felt like Aaron was truly back in the room with him.

The younger man rolled his eyes. 

Robert took his hand in his again, and Aaron busied himself with staring at their intertwined fingers. "I mean it," Robert told him. "You are. There aren't many people who would look at all the shit they've been through in life and want to use their experiences to help people."

Aaron looked at him. "I've done plenty of bad things over the years, Robert. Let's not make me out to be some kind of saint. Call it community payback or something."

"You know I've made just as many mistakes as you, if not more. But I'm not like you, Aaron. I never cared enough to make the effort for other people, to be selfless for anyone other than my favourite people. So that money deserves to be put to good use."

"I wasn't planning on charging people though. We wouldn't be making a profit."

Robert smiled, looking completely unbothered. "I guessed that when you talked about community payback. The point is to offer something that people wouldn't ordinarily be able to get involved in, right?" Aaron nodded. "I mean, if this had been a thing when you were younger, you wouldn't have been able to pay for classes, would you?"

"Not a chance."

"I think you should do it," Robert told him without missing a beat.

His husband was quiet for a minute, taking it all in. "I think," he said eventually. "We should do it. I'm going to need your business brain anyway, aren't I?" Robert made a show of putting on a smug grin, and Aaron laughed. 

It took a few months, but Aaron's vision came to life. Charlie agreed to come on board to do the official training, and a young woman, Natalie, was hired to teach the boxercise classes. Aaron was able to come to an arrangement with the manager of his gym to hold the lessons there, but once they started advertising he grew nervous at the thought that perhaps nobody would be interested.

He needn't have worried. Men and women, most of them in their late teens and twenties, were quick to join up. Several parents of school age teenagers called for information too, many of whom ended up signing their kids up. It seemed to help that the boxing sessions were described as disciplined, so mums and dads felt reassured that violence wasn't promoted. 

People had various reasons for wanting to do the lessons. Anger issues, low self-esteem, anxiety, shyness; by the time the first day was underway, Aaron realised he could recognise so many of his own teenage traits in several of the attendees.

Robert had been heavily involved in setting things up, but he was more than happy to watch in the background. After the first session, in which Aaron participated as an assistant coach and demonstrator, Robert wandered over to his side and gave him a hug and a proud peck on the lips. "I am so proud of you."

"Thank you," Aaron told him, voice soft and gentle. "For everything. You said you're not selfless, but you are. This wouldn't have been possible without you."

"It's all you. Anything for you, okay?" 

They held each other tight, their words settling warmly between them, needing no reply.

*

Aaron's venture had been running for just over a year, a big hit in Hotten and in the village. The scrapyard was doing well, as was Home James, which meant that they barely lost out via paying boxing instructors and the gym after shelling out the once for the necessary equipment.

Now it was Robert's turn to talk over an idea with Aaron. He arrived home from an afternoon of meetings about half an hour before his husband came back from work, got changed out of his suit and sat watching television while he waited. He knew if Aaron was to walk in to a quiet house, and Robert still all dressed up and sat in silence, he would worry that something was wrong. 

As it was, everything felt right.

When he told him what was on his mind, Aaron's eyes widened, his mouth dropping open. "You want to have kids? With me?"

"Yes. With you. If you want it."

"Of course I...Robert," Aaron stopped, suddenly overwhelmed. His voice broke on his husband's name, and Robert reached for him, wrapping him up in his arms.

"Hey, what's this, eh?" he soothed. "Nothing to cry about. Unless the idea of raising kids with me fills you with dread."

Aaron shook with laughter in his arms. He pulled away and wiped at his eyes with his sleeve - because some habits never left no matter how much time passed by. "No, it's...it's everything."

"And so are you."

Over the next few months, they went through a long process to be approved for adoption. They had chosen that route over surrogacy, loving the idea of creating a family for a child who may not have had the best start in life. 

The only thing was, Aaron had been so anxious about his criminal record being delved into. In the end, with Robert by his side, he opened up about his past. His childhood, his history with violence - he didn't share the lengthy account, but he didn't lie. He explained that he didn't want to use his abuse as an excuse for the things he'd done, but that it had taken a long time for him to tackle his problems and where they had come from. He talked about the boxing, and the classes he had set up. 

His honesty, along with positive character references for them both and the way their love for each other practically shone from their faces (even when they were nervous as hell) meant that eventually, they were approved and placed on the waiting list.

It was several more months before they got a call. The wait had been hard, but they had plenty of things keeping them busy in the meantime; particularly with the boxing/boxercise project. Aaron's old cellmate Ethan joined the team as a coach alongside him, refusing any kind of payment in return. It would also come to be a great help when fatherhood beckoned and Aaron wouldn't be available for every session.

It was Aaron who was at home when the call from their adoption agency came through. There was a little girl, aged two-and-a-half, who had been living in a temporary foster home for a few weeks since her mother had died very suddenly. The woman had had no family other than an elderly mother who simply wasn't able to look after her, though she was desperate not to lose contact.  
By the time the phone call was over, a meeting had been arranged for a few days' time where Aaron and Robert would meet the little girl and her grandmother with a social worker. When he told Robert, the older man was over the moon. The emotions didn't hit him until they arrived home from meeting their almost-daughter.

She was called Bethany, and she was beautiful. She had big brown eyes and dark curly hair, and when they said hello to her she was too shy to speak. But Aaron was the first to get a smile out of her when he pulled a few funny faces. She sat next to her nana, Edie, totally unfazed as the adults got to know each other. When the conversation got serious, the social worker took the little girl to another corner of the room where there were toys she could play with, leaving Aaron, Robert and the elderly woman to chat more privately.

Edie, who wasn't very steady on her feet and lived in shared retirement housing, was kind and open-minded. She told them all about her late daughter, and what a wonderful mother she had been.

She explained that Bethany's biological father had never been involved, and that was his choice. So all the child had ever known was her mum. Edie liked the idea of Bethy, as she called her, having two dads who had chosen her; while "my Hayley will always be her mummy". The two men were deeply moved by that. 

Robert told her that Bethany would have two brilliant aunties and two more grandmothers, so she would never be short of female influences in her life. Edie didn't live far away, meaning she would be able to see her granddaughter regularly. The adoption would be legalised, and the paperwork officially signed, in a matter of days. 

As Bethany sat happily playing with a teddy bear, Aaron and Robert went to join her. Aaron asked her if she would like to come and live with them, in a new 'forever home'. Bethany looked up at him, at both of them, and simply said: "house?"

They smiled, first at each other, and then at her. "Yes," Robert answered. "In a house. Would you like that?"

Edie and Karen, the social worker, watched the three of them together as little Bethany spent a good half a minute looking from Aaron to Robert and back again. 

"Can I bring doggy?" she asked, her voice very serious.

"Have you got a doggy?" Aaron said. 

Karen looked at him, "it's a little toy dog she keeps in her room," she informed them with a smile. 

"Of course you can," Robert chuckled. "What's your doggy's name?"

Bethany blinked at him, "Doggy." Aaron nudged his husband, and a brief look passed between them. In those few seconds, they each knew that the other already loved this little girl.

And later, as they sat down at home, that was the moment Robert's composure slipped. One look at Aaron and he felt himself getting choked up. Aaron put his arms around him, just as Robert had done for him all those months ago when the subject of children was only a possibility.

"Sorry," Robert mumbled into his husband's neck. "Just can't believe it's actually happening, you know."

"I know."

Aaron waited for Robert to pull back just enough from their embrace so they could look at each other; the familiar words still holding so much meaning. Maybe even more so than it had before. Running a hand through Robert's hair, Aaron kissed him. 

"Love you."

"I love you more. We're really dong this...we're going to be parents."

"We are. Daddies, eh," Aaron grinned at him, and Robert's face matched his.

*

When Bethy was five, her nana Edie passed away. The funeral was small, so Aaron and Robert felt it was suitable enough to take her there to say goodbye. She had cried when they had told her the news, but a little smile had broken through when Robert had explained that her nana had gone to join her mummy as an angel in the sky. She was happy that her mother wouldn't be on her own any more.

Lift went on. The boxing and boxercise classes were now a well-known feature in Hotten and in the village. Business was going well at both the yard and Home James. Liv worked in graphic design and had her own flat in Manchester, venturing home to visit as often as she could. She even joined in with the boxercise a few times, loving it just as much as she had in her university days. 

Aaron still loved the sessions, when he had the time to go and take part. He may not have always been able to attend, but he visited the gym at least once a week to train. It had been a long time now since he had used the boxing as an outlet for anger and pain, but as a hobby he hadn't tired of it.

When Bethy was eight, Robert and Aaron discussed the subject of more children. Robert was in his forties now, and Aaron was approaching the category himself. They didn't want to leave it much later if it was something they both wanted.

As it turned out, the conversation made them both realise that they were more than happy being fathers of one. Bethany wasn't fussed about having brothers and sisters - she had a big group of friends at school and a big extended family around her. The Dingles adored her, as did Robert's side of the family. There was no desire there to change anything. 

When Bethy was thirteen, life suddenly got tough again. Robert had been feeling unwell for weeks, and a trip to the doctors led to a hospital referral and more tests than they knew even existed. Chas, Diane and Vic were on hand to look after Bethany while Aaron stayed by his husband's side. The diagnosis was Leukemia, and the doctors seemed hopeful that they had caught it early enough. 

Treatment started almost immediately. It made Robert sick, and though they tried to shield Bethy from the worst of the situation she couldn't always be kept from seeing the reality of her dad's illness. She was old enough to understand what cancer was, and was great at cheering her parents up on a bad day - bright, bubbly and kind-hearted as she was. But she would hear Robert vomiting after the heaviest of chemotherapy sessions and ask Aaron why something that was supposed to make him better was only making him feel worse.

"The medicine your dad is having sometimes makes people feel worse before they start feeling better," Aaron explained, his heart breaking both for Robert and for their daughter.

It broke a little bit more when Bethy asked him if Robert might die like her mum did. Her death had been as a result of an undetected heart condition, and although she had been very young at the time the little girl had grown up knowing all about her mother. Her grandmother Edie had put a scrapbook together of photos and stories for her.

Aaron knew Bethy felt the loss of her every now and then, despite the happy teenager she was most of the time. So the thought that Robert's illness had brought all those emotions to the surface for her left him feeling helpless. He couldn't promise her anything, but neither was he going to give her any reason to think that history might repeat itself.

A few weeks later Robert had finished his first round of treatment, but his immune system was low and he picked up an infection. He was admitted to hospital, and Liv took some time off work to come home and help the family in any way she could. 

She looked after Bethy while Vic, Diane and Aaron were at the hospital. For the first few nights, Aaron slept next to his husband's hospital bed, too terrified to leave him.

"Aaron," Robert woke from dozing and reached out for him, and Aaron jumped from his seat to take his hand.

"Yeah, I'm here," he soothed. "I'm right here."

"Bethy?"

"She's with Liv. I'll bring her in to see you tomorrow, okay?"

Robert shook his head. "She doesn't need to see me like this."

"She's desperate to see you already and you've only been here two days. We'll see how you feel tomorrow, yeah?"

"I miss her too," he said, tears in his eyes. "I just want to protect her from all this. It's bad enough I'm putting you through it."

Aaron pressed a kiss to his temple. "Hey, don't. You're poorly and you're not putting me through anything. I love you and I'm here, just like you've always been for me."

"I heard what she asked you, Bethy; she sounded so scared. I should have been able to help, to tell her everything's gonna be alright. Instead I'm too ill to be a proper dad, or a proper husband."

"Robert, you are an amazing dad and a wonderful husband," Aaron told him firmly. "Yeah, she's been scared, and it made her think about what happened to her mum; and it's horrible and it's hard. But it's a natural reaction. Bethy knows how loved she is, and she knows you are fighting every single day to beat this thing." 

Smiling softly at him, Robert looked down at their linked hands and stroked along the inside of Aaron's palm. He didn't speak, because he could tell the younger man had more to say.

"So you stop worrying about us and you focus on getting better, 'cos you know what I said before we first got engaged, about sticking around until you're eighty? Well I decided that's not long enough. I want you around to get your telegram from the Queen, Mr Dingle."

Robert laughed, tugging on Aaron's hand now until he moved even closer to him for a hug. "I'll do my very best, Mr Sugden."

After a few days the infection had lifted, but he wasn't yet well enough to come home. He had more blood tests and scans to determine whether the treatment was working, and the results would take another twenty-four hours. Aaron headed home to see their daughter and pick up a few things for Robert, but found himself stopping at the gym on the way. 

He had been running around all week, hardly sleeping and only eating enough to refuel. Now he was alone with his thoughts for long enough to linger, and anger flooded through his veins. Only there was no one to be angry with; no one to shout at.

Unlocking the doors to the gym - the perks of using the place to run classes - he walked inside, searching for one of the punch bags. He forced himself to be sensible and find himself some gloves; he couldn't go back to the hospital with a bruised or bloodied hand if he pummelled the bag just that bit too hard.

He jabbed, punched and kicked the bag, venting every spark of anger and fear going through his head. He didn't stop until he ran out of breath, sitting on the floor with his knees tucked into his chest. The tears came quickly now that he wasn't distracting himself with boxing, and he sobbed until his throat was raw. 

Aaron allowed himself another five minutes to calm down before he stood up, packed away the bag and gloves and left. He was spared the task of locking up as Charlie was just arriving.

"You okay?" the man asked, patting him on the shoulder. 

Aaron shrugged, opening his mouth to try for a response, but unable to find any words.

Charlie sighed. "Daft question, wasn't it. Look, have you been overdoing it on that punch bag? Robert'll be having words with me for not looking out for you."

"Robert doesn't need to know that. And anyway, there's no damage done. All I did was tire myself out a bit." Charlie could only nod at that, but he did tell Aaron to call if he needed anything before they said goodbye.

The next day, Robert's tests came back showing that the chemo was doing its job. He would need to complete the rest of his treatment, but the prognosis was looking promising. When the doctor had left the room, Aaron looked at Robert's pale but smiling face and cried with relief.

"Sorry, sorry," he gasped, when his husband tried to comfort him. "Just ignore me, I'll be fine in a minute."

"Shhh, it's alright, it's all gonna be alright," Robert told him, stroking a hand through Aaron's curls. "Aaron, you don't have to pretend with me. Talk to me."

"I'm supposed to be looking after you, not falling apart."

"You have been looking after me, you silly thing."

"I just...I got so angry yesterday, at how unfair this all is. I wanted to be able to keep it together, be strong for you and Bethy."

"You are strong," Robert insisted. "You've been so strong. Hey, look at me." Aaron did as he asked. "You've been to the gym?"

"How could you tell?"

"You looked even more knackered when you came back last night than you did when you'd left."

"A right little Sherlock, you, aren't you?" he sniffled, and Robert grinned.

"Yeah, well, I'm wasted working in business, aren't I. And I bet you went on your own, didn't you?"

Aaron looked down at his hands. "No point hiding anything from you, is there?"

"Never," Robert smiled. "Please tell me--"

"I was fine, Rob. I even stopped to get some gloves before I beat the shit out of the punch bag," that got a chuckle out of his husband. 

"Good. Aaron, I'm not trying to get at you. It's actually good that you went to the gym. After so many years of hurting yourself and...not knowing how to deal with the worst of times, here you are using your boxing and doing it safely. Just promise me you--"

"...won't overdo it. I promise," Aaron finished. Leaning down, he kissed Robert gently on the lips.

"Mmm. My mouth's all dry, can you pour me some water?"

"Yeah, here y’are, have some proper water from home. This hospital stuff doesn't taste the same." He took a bottle out of the bag he'd brought in, and Robert smiled fondly up at him as he lay back against the pillows. 

"You're so good to me, you know."

"I know."

Even after their good news, the treatment wasn't straightforward. Weeks after returning home, more chemotherapy made Robert sick again; although he was given medication to alleviate the symptoms. Once they got the hang of the timings, knowing when was best to take the anti-sickness drugs, he finally started to feel better.

He lost his hair, but Liv and Bethy managed to cheer him up by buying him a variety of colourful hats. Very few of which he ever wore in public, of course, but he loved them for it all the same.

It took almost a year before they were able to sit in the consultant's office, waiting for the test results at the end of a gruelling, exhausting treatment plan. Robert gripped Aaron's hand, not knowing what to think as they waited for the verdict. When the man broke into a smile, he heard Aaron let out a tentative breath beside him.

It was good news. He was cancer-free. There would still be regular check-ups, and if all was well after the five year mark he would get the official all-clear. They left the hospital in a daze of relief and joy and shock that it was all over. Aaron kissed Robert in the car park, and ran his hands through the hair that was just beginning to grow back.

"I've felt fear plenty of times in my life, but nothing tops the fear of losing you," Aaron admitted in a quiet voice. 

"I was terrified of leaving you too," the older man replied. 

"I know. But you're not. You're staying right here with me and Bethy. Till we're old and grey and wrinkly and the Queen's knocking on our door with your telegram for turning a hundred."

"You...don't actually believe that she hand delivers the letters herself, do you?"

Aaron feigned disappointment. "She doesn't?!"

Robert nudged him, laughing all the way to the car as they started to head for home.

Reality sank in during the journey. As Aaron drove, Robert found himself feeling overwhelmed that after everything they had been through, in the wake of one ten minute appointment it was suddenly all over.

"Rob, you okay?" Aaron checked, noticing that his husband was breathing quite deeply.

Robert couldn't answer him. He just couldn't speak. Aaron considered pulling the car over, but in the next second Robert was able to tell him he was alright.

He wasn't alright; Aaron knew that. 

He kept driving, and after a few minutes parked at the gym.

"What are we doing here?"

"Just trust me. Come on," he got out, knowing the place would be open by now but relatively quiet for the time of day. Robert followed him inside.

"Did you have a training session booked for today and just forgot to tell me?"

Aaron laughed, taking Robert's hand and squeezing it. He could feel that he was shaking. "No. We're here for you. So you can get out everything you've been feeling since you've been ill. I think you need something, and I know you've always said boxing isn't for you, but how about this. A punch bag you can hit as hard as you like. Pretend it's the cancer you've just kicked in the backside if it helps?"

Robert looked at him for a moment. Then his lips tilted into half a smile and he nodded. Aaron found him some gloves, took his hand in his and walked him over to the nearest punch bag.

"No gloves for you?" Robert asked, surprised.

"I don't think I'll need it today," Aaron replied, helping him put the protective hand gear on.

It took a few minutes for Robert to really work up enough confidence to hit the bag - it was strangely nerve-wracking when he'd never done it before. Finally he took an almighty swing and let out a loud grunt along with it. There was no one around to hear them, and frankly even if there was Aaron wouldn't have cared, so he cheered him on.

Robert punched the bag over and over, and as his husband watched him he could tell that all his emotions and all the bad thoughts were being poured into every swing. 

One jab for the way the cancer had stopped him from being an active dad; another hit for how it had taken away countless chances to take Aaron out on proper date nights. A few kicks - the older man had surprised himself there - for the worry his illness had caused his loved ones. And a few extra punches for the pain and sickness that had seemed so relentless over the past year.

Aaron stepped in to stop him when he started to look the slightest bit wiped out.

"I can see how you might get carried away with this," Robert confessed as he got his breath back.

"You feel better?"

"Well, I don't think I'll be joining the gym any time soon. But yeah, that was...it really helped. Thank you."

"You don't need to tha--"

Robert cut him off. "No, I do. You've been there through all of this. I don't have the words right now so just...thank you."

Aaron kissed his sweaty forehead, lips lingering there for a few extra seconds. "I only did what you've always done for me."

"I love you so much."

"And I love you. Come on then, let's get you home."

"Home to grow old, yeah?"

"Oh we'll definitely be growing old together, Mr Dingle," Aaron promised. "But there's still a few good years left in us yet."

"They'll all be good years with you, Mr Sudgen. You, Bethy, Liv. My family."

They looked at each other, eyes sparkling with happiness. "I can't wait," Aaron told him.

*

When Bethany was eighty-six, she told the story of her adoptive parents to her great-grandchildren.

She told them about her two fathers, whose lives had always been complicated but whose hearts had been full as they found each other and later found her.

Robert had, as Aaron had demanded, reached his 100th birthday and beyond. Aaron reached his a few years later, and it was shortly after that that they passed away, within months of each other. Upon his death, Aaron's youth work with his and Robert's boxing scheme (Aaron always reminded people they had done it together) was recognised by several charities for its dedication to helping troubled young adults. Their picture was in the national newspapers.

Bethy's great-grandchildren, ten year old Hannah and six year old Oliver, listened with great interest right to the end, at which point their father, her grandson Harry, arrived.

"Classes still running well, are they love?" she asked with a proud smile.

Harry nodded cheerfully. "It's great, busy as ever, Gran."

Bethy sighed contentedly. "Good."

"Daddy," said Hannah. "Is it really true that your boxing club is the same one from Granny's story?"

"Ah, so you've been hearing all about your great, great-grandads then?" he grinned. "Yes, it's true."

Looking over at the photo of Aaron and Robert on her mantelpiece, Bethy returned her gaze to her grandson and felt, not for the first time, how proud they would be of the legacy they had left behind. Boxing, family and all.

"Are you still coming to the next boxercise session, Gran?" Harry asked, breaking her out of her thoughts.

"Wouldn't miss it, my love," she smiled.

Sure, the classes were still for the young ones, Bethy thought - but as the oldest member of the founding family, she felt it was her duty to pop in every now and then. And if she ended up joining in, or even having a go at the punch bag during the next boxing class too...well, she was a Sugden-Dingle. No one was going to talk her out of it!


End file.
